4 Tips for Blissful Sleeping

Keeping our bodies strong, flexible and toned is key to great physical health, but not to be underestimated is the importance of quality sleep. We spend approximately a third of our life sleeping, during which our bodies repair, rejuvenate and reset mental and physical functionality.  

As a yoga instructor and practitioner, people assume uninterrupted deep sleep comes easily to me. After a long day of balancing teaching with hectic parenting responsibilities I have no guarantee of a night of restful sleep. Like many people, often my mind continues to bustle with thoughts, and my body sometimes aches from the physical strain. 

By practicing mindful behaviors and creating a nurturing resting place, I’ve found greater peace and comfort in my sleep, which has benefited my life greatly. Here are a few tips I’ve found incredibly helpful to achieve the blissful slumber we all deserve. 

1. Create a peaceful environment. My husband taught me to wind down the mind and body about 30 minutes to 1 hour before going to bed by shutting off all electronics, dimming the lights in the house, even turning off music. Especially avoid bright screens on computers, iPads, cell phones, which he believes stimulate the brain.

2. Sleep on a hypo-allergenic, firm, organic bed. One of my biggest sleep impediments was allergies, in addition to tossing and turning at night.   When I switched to organic and hypo-allergenic bedding my congestion cleared and the firm spinal support allowed me to sleep more deeply, and I didn’t wake up with the usually soreness and crick in my neck. My husband (who also practices yoga) and I love our organic coconut fiber mattress from Palmpring.

3. Use meditative/relaxing breathing exercises. Find a comfortable seat, and for 1 to 5 minutes focus on elongating the breath, taking deeper breaths each time. Shift into a meditative breath: inhale for 7 seconds, hold breath for 4 seconds, exhale for 7 seconds. Repeat this cycle 5 to 10 times. Next, lie down on your bed with butt against headboard, feet up the wall, let the blood circulate down. Stay there at least 60 seconds (maximum 3 minutes). From there, move gently to a savasana position on your back with pillows under your knees. Feel your body is getting lighter and lighter. Loosen your jaw, let go of tension, close your eyes. Don’t worry about your ability to fall asleep.

4. Watch what you eat. Avoid sugar consumption after dinner which includes staying away from fruit. Let your largest meal be breakfast, lunch a power meal that keeps you going, and dinner a “recovery” meal. Drinking lots of water and eating healthy contributes to sounder sleep.

His and Her Tips for a Blissful Relationship

Stop waiting for your partner to be more romantic and spontaneous — and start being more romantic and spontaneous yourself! 

It’s often said that men and women are from different planets, but it's the act of joining forces and creating a working partnership of two individuals that makes falling in love so sweet. Both of you have to do your part for the union to work. By focusing on what you can do to tighten the bonds of intimacy (rather than waiting for him to take the lead), you can be sure to make some powerful and lasting changes in your relationship.
Tips for Her:

Ask for what you want. Tell him when something feels good. Vocalize what drives you wild — whether it's when he kisses your neck, rubs your behind, or whatever you're craving tonight. He wants to do what turns you on, so let him know when he gets it right!
Start thinking sex. When you read, watch, or otherwise think about sex, you're going to get the right juices flowing. Boost your libido by making sex more of a presence in your life. Buy some erotica or sexy videos; keep a romance novel in your purse. Use them when you need to get in the mood or when it's been a while.

Just do it! The more you have sex, the more you will want to have sex and the closer your relationship with your partner will feel. Often, you just need to get things started to realize you are, in fact, in the mood.
Tips for Him:

Invest in a little “choreplay.” A recent study found that women are more likely to be attracted to their mates after they helped out around the house, whether it was emptying the dishwasher or folding the laundry. Why? Probably because women are so frenzied trying to do it all that they have no energy leftover for sex. Help her out around the house, and you will not only earn brownie points (and a cleaner house), but you will also give her a chance to relax…and a chance for her libido to shoot on up!

Take charge. Husbands can sometimes feel nagged by their partners, but the truth is that your partner values and appreciates your opinion. Speak up and assert yourself, rather than sitting back and letting her take control. Even though it seems like she enjoys being a type A personality, the truth is that being in charge becomes tiresome, especially when you are supposed to be equal partners, so help her out by taking over the reins now and then.

Treat her to special surprises. Men often think they need to bring out the big guns to impress their partners, but the truth is that it is the little things that count. Forget the dozen roses and the expensive dinner, and commit to being a thoughtful lover throughout the day. Bring her a cup of coffee in the morning, or start her car during the winter so she doesn’t have to shiver during her ride to work. Refill her prescriptions for her or pick up dry cleaning. Anything that makes her life easier and shows her how much you care will fit the bill, no matter how big or small the act might be!

 

Happiness - Be Blissful

Our true nature is to renounce thoughts every passing moment. Simply allow each thought to rise like a bubble and burst.

Man by his very nature is an unclutched and blissful being. What do we mean by the term unclutched? Let me explain. Every thought that arises in us is like a bubble that forms, rises and dies. Every thought independently rises and dies before the next thought comes up. For example, if you are sitting in a chair and suddenly get up, the moment you have decided to get up, that moment the thought of sitting has left you. If you are working on your computer and decide to shut down the machine, that moment, the thought that you want to work has died. So every thought is unconnected and happens in series, one after the other. One thought has to die before the next one comes up. This is our true nature.

Our true nature is to renounce thoughts every passing moment. By the word renounce, I mean simply allowing each thought to rise like a bubble and burst and allowing the next thought to rise. Our thoughts have only a vertical existence, like rising bubbles.

This process of allowing thoughts to rise and die without trying to connect them is what we mean by being unclutched. As long as this natural process is allowed to happen, things are all right.

But what we do is, we start connecting these thoughts randomly and form a shaft. By doing this, we convert the vertical and unclutched process into a horizontal one with linear connectivity. Here starts the whole problem. As long as each thought is allowed to rise and die, we can take on any amount of load at the physical and mental planes and our consciousness will remain light and blissful. Once we start connecting thoughts, our consciousness suffers and we start feeling burdened. It becomes damaging to our being.

All emotions like worry, lust, discontentment, jealousy, fear, ego and attention, are purely because we find a connection between independent incidents, between independent thoughts, and create a concept for ourselves and start relating with that concept. We create an imaginary shaft with our thoughts and we suffer because of this.

These emotions create all forms of violence, be they religious wars, social conflicts or political unrest. The basis or the root of all forms of violence is our emotions and the basis of our emotions is our habit of creating imaginary shafts of our thoughts and empowering them to work on us.

While creating these shafts, we choose the thoughts depending on whether we want pain or pleasure. We pick pleasant thoughts at random and connect them to form a shaft of pleasure or pick negative thoughts and connect them to form a shaft of pain. We create shafts of pain and pleasure alternately for ourselves, and oscillate between these two emotions. To unclutch from this tendency is the master key to a blissful life.

If you deeply analyze how we connect our thoughts instead of renouncing them, you will understand how we create suffering for ourselves. It is the mind that finds the connection. As such, there is no connection between our thoughts.

We have been trained to feed on words and thoughts. That is why we create these shafts. We feed on words because we operate out of fear or greed all the time. Out of fear or greed, we create connectivity in our thoughts. We are afraid to let go of this process because if we let go, there is nothing else to hold on to. We have never experienced an unclutched state of mind where there is no shaft, only bubble-like thoughts.

In the unclutched state, there is no scope for fear or greed. You will simply BE, that's all. But it becomes difficult to understand that we can exist without this shaft of thoughts. A small story:

An eye specialist was treating a blind man. He assured him, "Once I operate on your eye, you will have your vision back and you can throw your stick away."

The blind man became afraid when he heard this. He asked the doctor, "I understand that I will get my vision, but how can I walk without my stick?"

The man was so used to walking with the stick that he could not understand that by getting his vision he could throw away the stick! In the same way, when the truth is that we can live in an unclutched fashion blissfully, we wonder how. We see clutching thought shafts as inevitable!

We fail to see how mythical the whole thing is. Our mind is a myth. We have empowered it and become a slave to it, that's all. It is nothing but mental slavery. Another small story:

There was an old man in a family who could not be pleased at any cost.

He remained stubborn and grumpy, no matter how much his family tried to keep him in good spirits. His children and grandchildren would visit him and try to cheer him up, but in vain. Suddenly one day, he became very gentle and cheerful. His family was shocked at the sudden transformation. One of his granddaughters asked him courageously, "Grandpa, how come you have changed so suddenly?" The old man replied, "All my life, I tried my best to get a contented mind, but never succeeded in getting it. So I have decided to be contented with it now."

Just see the play of the mind! Your mind can make you or break you. That is why we need to be free from it.

Just watch the thoughts rising in you. Clearly see how each thought rises and dies and the next thought comes up. Observe how you effortlessly connect these thoughts and create ideas and concepts. Watch the play of these concepts upon yourself; you will understand how you create the whole myth. I tell you: Connecting thoughts is the Original Sin.

Living in an unclutched fashion is the way to a blissful living. Just decide that you will not connect any two thoughts, that you will not pass any judgment on any thought or any incident.

When you work in an unclutched fashion, you will find your capacity expanding; you will take on a lot more responsibility without getting stressed; you will not experience mood swings between pain and pleasure; you will be blissful all the time. We are so used to happiness that comes with a reason. This reason is again a shaft that we create with our thoughts. Once you stop creating these shafts, you will be blissful all the time.

10 Tips For A Blissful Marriage

Blissful marriage does not automatically come because you and your partner love each other. Whilst love is extremely essential in to a blissful marriage, at times love is not just sufficient and you may require to polish your relationship just like most other relationships. Transparency in marriage and proper consideration of your partner's feelings are two emotional features that are the answers to a blissful marriage. Even more routine stuff like domestic cores and fiscal understanding could factor in to the marriage state. It is very important to recognize that a marriage is a many-sided relationship that requires to be fostered in all of its ability for it to be successful. 

1. The willingness to take sacrifices in marriage is a single secret to a blissful marriage. The married partners must be ready to put their spouse happiness ahead of theirs occasionally for the marriage to really work. If both partners are wholly self-seeking and never willing to make sacrifices, then this it will generate bitterness in that marriage. Sometimes the sacrifices might be immense but most regularly it is the little things stuff matter most. Even cooking a meal that you dislike but that you know your partner fancy's will let your partner know that you care about them and are willing to go a mile to please them oftentimes. 

2. Whilst making sacrifices is significant in a blissful relationship, it is also imperative to occasionally do stuff that are just meant for yourself. It is good to have lots of similar likes but it is also imperative to have some stuff that you like doing individually. Having separate hobbies is good because it provides you the opportunity to be away from your spouse one time in awhile and gives you an opportunity to appreciate how great you miss your partner when the two of you are apart. It also affords you the opportunity to discover stuff on your own and prevents monotony from building up in the relationship.

3. The other secret to a blissful marriage is to uphold a warm and loving relationship with your partner. Having physical bond with you partner will help you maintain blissful marriage. Don't be surprised that little gestures like hugs and holding hands present to you the chance to re-connect with your partner everyday.

4. Money can be a great source of stress in a marriage so it is wise to try your best and make sure that you don't allow your monetary situation to devastate your cherished marriage. When monetary distress come up in your relationship, it is imperative that you discuss the issue with your partner so that you are both aware of what is taking place and work on creating a budget together. Collaborating on this issues will make it certain that non of the party feels excluded from the decision and policy making process, it will also make sure that and non of the party puts up with the strain of worrying about money issues in private. 

5. Equal sharing of domestic chores is another good secret to a blissful marriage. If one partner feels as if they are the ones that are carrying the big chunk of responsibility in the domestic chores, this can lead to bitterness. Sharing of domestic chores not only prevents bitterness but it also provides the couple a good chance to work as a team, this works well towards strengthening their bond. Both partners must take a active role in doing domestic chores and let their spouse know if they are starting to feel overwhelmed.

6. Transparent and candid communication is also obligatory for a blissful marriage. Without open communication in marriage the relationship will most likely be struggle. It is significant therefore to be sincere and straightforward with your spouse and share your worries and concerns and pay attention to what your spouse wants to say and also make a big effort to appreciate their viewpoint. Open communication about marital problems and anxieties is imperative but it is also significant to communicate about your ambitions and even your everyday lives. Most of these kinds of communication between partners bring them much close together and promote a blissful marriage. 

7. Still on open communication, it is also imperative that you let your spouse know when they say or do something to hurts you. Your failure to do so will let the dilemma to persist and further aggravate problem in your marriage. If you suppress your emotions then your spouse will be oblivious of what they had done to upset you and are most likely to repeat the same things once again. You could also start to shun your spouse for the reason that you are annoyed and you do not want to initiate an argument. Your spouse may in turn interpret your strange behavior in a different way and be angry by your behavior. Just coming out and informing your spouse the reasons as to why you are displeased can greatly let you escape this preventable host of troubles.

8. Realizing that your partner and you are at all times in total agreement is also significant to a blissful marriage. Whereas you might concur on plenty of things it is impractical to believe that you and your spouse are going to be in sync all the time. It's fine to differ occasionally as much as you value each others beliefs and feelings and don't think that any one difference will be the end of your marriage.

9. Impulsiveness is also an essential part of a blissful marriage. Letting yourselves to descend in to a routine pattern could lead to monotony but being a spur-of-the-moment at times will put off dullness from creeping in and help maintain the marriage in an interesting lane.

10. Lastly, keep in mind the reasons as to why you are married to your spouse; remember that it is one of the most significant secrets to a blissful marriage. Always appreciating the uniqueness in your partner that attracted you to your partner will always remind you to never forget your love for your spouse. It will also make sure that they are always lovely before your eyes. Many things could change all through your marriage, but the one stuff that will never change is the reason why you fell in love initially.

A blissful marriage is never assured no-matter the intensity of love that exists between the partners. There are plenty of unpredictable that can greatly impact your the happiness and accomplishment of your marriage. It is significant that both parties' appreciate that they must always work on every of the above features if they ever expect to have a happy and successful marriage to stay behind a contented and strong relationship.
 

One of the most common questions we hear is, "How do we make our relationship work?" The answers are complicated, varied, and, after a while, can start to sound like muddled platitudes. But these commonplace sayings get repeated because they work. With this in mind, we pulled together 12 cliches that, in fact, reveal simple, tried-and-true advice for having a healthy, happy relationship. Read on and let us know what you think:

1. Mind your manners. "Please," "thank you" and "you're welcome," can go a long way in helping your partner remember that you respect and love him and don't take him for granted.

2. Variety is the spice of life. Studies have shown that dullness can lead to dissatisfaction with a relationship. Trying something new can be as simple as visiting an unfamiliar restaurant or as grand as a backpacking trip through Sri Lanka. Discoveries you make together will keep you feeling close.

3. The couple that plays together, stays together. Find a sport or hobby that you both love (no, watching TV does not count) and make that a priority in your relationship. Camping, biking, building model trains... whatever it is, find something you enjoy doing together.

4. Fight right. In order to have productive arguments, keep these rules in mind. Don't call your spouse names. When things get really tough, take a break from the argument. Let the other person finish his/her sentences. Don't initiate a discussion when you're angry.

5. I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine. No one likes demands, but everyone can appreciate a compromise. If you want your lover to do something and you're not sure he'll be agreeable, the quickest way to avoid a confrontation is to sweeten the deal. For example: "Sure, I'll watch Monday Night Football if you take me to see the next movie of my choice."

6. Two heads are better than one. Being in a relationship basically means you've made a merger; you've not only joined assets but inherited the other's problems as well. Rather than looking at his problems as merely his own, tackle them together. For example, if he's gaining weight, rather than pushing him to diet on his own, enroll in an exercise program together.

7. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Maintain your own friendships and occasionally have a night out without your significant other. Doing things without your s.o. not only makes you miss him or her, it also keeps you sane. And, in case the relationship doesn't work out, you'll still have your friends.

8. Sound it out. It other words: communicate! Talking out the tough subjects—money, religion, fidelity, raising kids—will not be the most fun you've had, but it'll be valuable.

9. Laughter is the best medicine. Learn to laugh at yourself and at silly mistakes. If he throws your $300 cashmere sweater in the dryer, laughing it off is, in the long run, better than getting angry. It's is just a $300 cashmere sweater, not the end of the world.

10. Keep your eyes on the prize. Yes, he forgot your co-worker's name for the tenth time, but it probably doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. If you keep your perspective fixed on the goal—to be in a happy, functioning partnership—you're less likely to get tangled up in every minor annoyance. Remember, you both want the same thing.

11. Quitters never win. Find a ritual and keep it alive, no matter what. Whether it's always kissing each other good night, renewing wedding vows every year, sleeping in as late as you want once a month or committing to having sex once a week, pick something that makes you both feel good and stick to it, even when you're tempted to skip.

12. When the going gets tough, the tough get going... to therapy. Studies show that couples who seek counseling during rocky periods are more successful in resolving their issues than those who don't. Whether its from a religious figure, counselor or mental health professional, getting an expert to help sort out strife is as wise as forgoing self-installation and hiring a plumber to put in a new sink.